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If she has no involvement with her as a teacher then I don't think she should be privy to information about your daughters progress. Although, as a colleague, maybe he valued her opinion. But as she is now your ex's wife, if your daughter would rather she not know about her progress, I think you have a good enough reason to speak to the headmaster and ask that she does not get involved with your daughter's education. It may cause friction between you and your ex but he has to understand that you and your daughter are uncomfortable with it.
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